Alone for the holidays? How to embrace the season on your terms
The holidays often carry a spotlight on family, friends, and togetherness, but the reality is that many people spend this time of year alone. Whether it’s due to circumstances like distance, loss of a loved one, or personal choice, being on your own during the holidays can be difficult but you can still find joy .
Why am I alone? And why that’s okay
There are countless reasons why someone might spend the holidays solo:
Living far from family or loved ones.
Experiencing the loss of someone close.
Recovering from a breakup or dealing with strained family ties.
Work or financial barriers preventing travel.
Whatever the reason, it’s important to remind yourself that your feelings are valid. Loneliness can make us feel isolated in our experience, but the truth is, many others share these emotions.
Making the holidays your own
Rather than viewing your solitude as a loss, you can use it as an opportunity to create something special for yourself:
Start your own traditions: Traditions don’t have to be inherited; they can be created. Bake your favorite treats, revisit a nostalgic movie, or treat yourself to something you enjoy.
Plan something to look forward to: Whether it’s a solo day trip, a cozy self-care evening, or a virtual call with a friend, having something planned can keep you feeling engaged and excited.
Connect in new ways: Volunteering during the holidays can help you meet with others while giving back. Helping at a food bank, animal shelter, or community event can keep you connected and give you a great sense of purpose.
Coping with emotions
The holidays often magnify feelings of grief or sadness, especially if you’ve recently lost someone or are facing your first holiday without a loved one. It’s okay to feel those emotions, and honoring them can help you move forward:
Find connection with the past: Watch the favourite movie of the loved one you miss, cook their favorite meal, or write them a letter. Small acts like these can bring a sense of closeness.
Talk about your grief: Sharing your feelings with someone you trust can lighten the emotional load, even if it’s just a conversation over the phone.
Reframing loneliness
Even surrounded by others, people can feel lonely if their connections lack depth or understanding. If you’re on your own this holiday season, use the quiet time for personal reflection and growth:
Make a list of the things you’re grateful for.
Think about your goals or values and how you want to align with them in the coming year.
Celebrate your independence and the opportunity to shape the holidays in a way that feels meaningful to you.
Small joys matter
Holidays don’t need grand gestures to feel special. You can find joy in simple acts:
Make yourself a comforting drink or meal.
Write and send a heartfelt letter to someone you care about.
Take a walk to enjoy holiday lights or decorations in your neighborhood.
The holidays don’t need to look like a Hallmark movie to be meaningful. Whether you’re alone by choice or circumstance, this season can be an opportunity to reconnect with yourself, explore new traditions, and find peace in your own way.
Information for this blog was provided by registered social worker, Sharona Pilmeister. Listen to season 2, episode 20 of the Living Fully podcast, Dealing with Loneliness During the Holidays.